You know how you always hear, especially when couples are just getting started, about how their partner makes them whole. We say things like, “where is your other half”, “he/she makes me whole” and “I’m incomplete without her/him”.
I’ve said all these things multiple times. Not sure where I heard it, but once I heard the following quote, I can’t stop thinking about it anytime a previously mentioned line is uttered.
You are a whole person! Nobody completes you or make you whole! You are a whole individual by yourself. Two people do not make one. Two whole individuals working together create one amazing marriage.
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Quit trying to have somebody else complete you. Friend you are strong, you are capable and you are a whole person without anybody else. Quit expecting him to tell you your hair cut is amazing when he doesn’t even notice you got your hair cut. Quit trying to get her to take an interest in your latest shop project when she has her own projects you don’t want to be involved in. Quit trying to have your spouse be the positive inner voice that is missing in your head.
So many of us are inundated with negativity both in the world and in our head. We try to get our spouse to be the positive voice we need and when they don’t come through, we feel horrible. In order to make a marriage work, you have to bring your best. You have to spend time with yourself to provide the best to your spouse.
Now with all that said, I want to backtrack a little. We cannot physically be strong 100% of the time. Marriage is all about being able to rely on another human being to always be there for you. You get the opportunity to lean on someone else when you aren’t able to stand up yourself.
What I’m trying to say, you are not a half of a whole. You are a whole. You are a whole being that is strong, confident, loved and able. You are a whole that is involved in a partnership with two whole complete beings. Sometimes we are the strong one, sometime we lean on the other, but none of that takes away from you being enough. You are so much more than a half!
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