The next three tips to a thriving marriage:
Did you miss part 1, part 2 or part 3? You can go read them here if you want to catch up. While not necessary to this blog making sense, you don’t want to miss the 9 tips mentioned in them.
#1: Cleanliness
We are 5 1/2 years into our marriage at this point and we still do not have a laundry organizational system that works for us. We fight about the dishes that don’t get put in the dishwasher. We fight about the dirt that rarely gets swept up. Cohabitation with another flawed human being is so freaking hard.
What I encourage you, and myself, to do is let go of the little things. Have a conversation with your spouse and see what bugs them. Matt likes the floor swept and things put away. But above all, he likes clean clothes. When I only have limited time, I prioritize those things. We’ve also had a really honest conversation about this is not 19th century. I am not a housewife. I work right alongside him on the farm. We both live in this house. We will both clean up. It ebbs and flows, but it is a joint effort inside and outside.
#2: Keep Secrets
What?! Keep secrets? That’s right my friend. Keep the mystery alive. We need to share 99% of our day with our spouse. But it’s also important to keep a little withheld. I’m not talking the big important stuff. I’m simply talking about little things. Matt doesn’t see me go potty. The end. Mystery alive. Your spouse doesn’t need to know all.
#3: Let It GO
Your welcome for getting that song stuck in your head for the rest of the day. It’s so true, though. All the things. Let them go. We got the advice at a bridal shower, if it’s not important in 5 years, don’t make it important in the next 5 minutes. That’s WAY easier said than done. Seriously. Life is so fleeting. Quit letting the little things bother us so much we become bitter. I’m all about having open and honest conversations about how him leaving his socks all over the house drives me bat shit crazy. I’m not all about letting it become a thing that I get super bitter and upset about and it ruins my day. It used to. But no more. I ask that the socks find their way to a laundry basket, but don’t let it drive me crazy. You must believe your spouse is a good-willed person and wants the best for your marriage. Quit trying to sabotage your marriage by holding on to things your partner doesn’t even know are issues.
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